Am I done with the games?
My BIG problem is that gamedev means way more to me than just a hobby, but no matter what angle I approach it from, I’m extremely bad at making games — YET I CANNOT simply give up and quit.
A short list of my failures:
- 2 failed playtests on Steam
- 2 failed demos on Steam (hey, I actually got further than playtests!)
- 5 unfinished game jams on itch.io
- ~25 dead prototypes in UE5
- ~5 dead prototypes in Godot
Like many others, I DREAMED of making a simple, fun little game, releasing it, and earning at least some money. But even that hope died about six months ago.
And yet here I am, literally standing on completely scorched earth, somehow still believing I can create an oasis.
Since it’s already obvious that I’ll die before I ever quit this, I’ve decided to turn my entire bumpy, crater-filled journey into an online monument. Whether it ends up being a tragicomedy that warns beginners away, or a story with a happy ending — that depends only on what happens next.
For now, this post is just me admitting to myself: the only jam I will never skip is my own lifelong jam.